Thursday, March 19, 2009

Rocky Moment

I had to run 19 miles today, and the thought that kept popping into my mind the whole way was: Why does the marathon have to be so long? I don't mean the actual reason Why. I know about the history with Pheidippides and the Olympics in Britain and all that. What I mean is Why! Why! Why! It's just so bleeping long!

My quad muscle, which is the only muscle in my leg that has never hurt before, hurt from mile 8 on. My lower back was so tight the last 12 miles. Geez! It was so hard. I can't believe that I've actually run two marathons before and this is still so hard.

So I'm running and suffering and closing in on mile 17, and the song that comes up on my iPod is "Gonna Fly Now." Yes, I mean the Rocky theme song. My kids and I were dorking around and, long story short, I ended up with it on my playlist as kind of a joke. Since the iPod doesn't know it was a joke, the song comes on. I am embarrassed to say that I cranked it up. I need this song. It's making me feel better... I'm grooving and moving. Did you know there are lyrics in that song? Well, the words, "It's so hard,now... Trying hard, now..." play in my ears and... I almost started crying!! I mean actually crying! My throat seized up and I thought tears might start flowing. The words "Trying hard, now" just summed up everything that I've been feeling. I just can't try any harder. I'm slow, I stink at this, but I am trying as hard as I can and that is going to have to do.

Did you know that it's really hard to run and cry at the same time? I was able to take a couple deep breaths and keep it together. I don't think anyone saw me. Whew!

So that is my embarrassing story for today. I was terrible. I suffered. I almost cried. Don't tell anyone, okay?

9 comments:

Melanie said...

your secret is safe with me... but i've cried during runs before, and yes, it's hard to do. sorry about the quad, but glad the song helped, i'll have to go listen to it now! :)

Nat said...

way to push through it. that is awesome!

Porkchopwi said...

Beth:
"I'm slow, I stink at this, but I am trying as hard as I can ..."

That's all any of us can expect to do. The key word is DO. Think how easy -- and probably unfulfilling -- sitting around NOT doing would be. What would you write about then? LOL

I think you have a lot to be happy with and proud of. I, for one, have not topped 13.1 miles running.

If I was into tough love, I'd say "Quit your crying (literally) and get back out there." But I'm not into that.

So congrats on a great run and keep working. And remember, you've got a good number of readers who believe in you. (While true, it feels pretty schmaltzy to say. LOL)

Now go have fun, and be sure you get some Lionel Ritchey on your iPod -- All Night Long comes to mind -- next time you're "dorking around."

Velma said...

I have cried during runs before - usually for sappy reasons. Blame it on fatigue. I have actually caught myself signing outloud to songs before, and I play the 'air drums'. Nothing wrong with having fun when you are running.

I am happy and sad to hear that marathon training never gets easy. I thought it was just me.

IronJenny said...

Awww - but the point is you made it. I hope you get a massage - sounds like maybe you just went out when you already had a little lactic buildup in the tissue and the first 8 miles just seized it up. Don't you feel great having it under your belt, though?!
I'm going out this morning from Plymouth... I will miss running with you. Mike's too fast so I can't keep up with the K-family goings on!
Try this song out of the blue - I am Free, by the Newsboys. It is the BEST running song ever recorded, I think. Great beat,great lyrics, "I am free to run, I am free to fly..." I sometimes play it over when I need a push. ;-)

Beth said...

You guys have made me feel so much better. I've found so much inspiration and motivation by following your journeys. Thanks for all of your encouragement. Also, I'm glad to know I'm not the only one who cries on a run! :)

Jean said...

Marathon legend Frank Shorter once said, "Why couldn't Pheidippides have died at 20 miles?" :)

Way to pull through on your 19 miler, Beth! And good luck at the Human Race tomorrow!

Tom said...

"I was terrible. I suffered. I almost cried." You forgot But I made it all 19 miles! Nicely done

Sunshine said...

We are not so good at recognizing people from their blog pictures.
I wonder if we saw you today!